Thursday, October 29, 2009

madonna's bra

In a perfect world, this would be some tranquil New Mexican view. But instead, it’s the interior of the Dick Clark American Bandstand Café at Newark Airport. I have spent rather too much of today in airports. Weather,

More specifically yet, it’s a pointy bra of Madonna’s, autographed by Madge, plus a few xx and oo s. In all its conical glory, this object is highly similar to the bras that were fashionable – at least among teenage girls – in the mid-60s, their concentric stitching creating little pointy ends that probably looked better on some people than on me. But the lack of the fit may also have had something to do with the fact that my one and only bra, when I was about 12, was a bra that, in desperation, I’d stolen from someone who was living with us as a paying guest that year. I couldn’t remotely figure out how else to obtain one – asking my mother was out of the question, since she believed that girls should start to wear a bra at the age that she did – around sixteen. Impossible to go through any more years – even weeks – of embarrassed agony: other girls in my class running their hands down my back to see if I was yet wearing one of these transformational objects; a sense of unpleasantly insecure wobbling when playing netball; wearing as many concealing layers of clothes as possible; finding curious modes of evasion in the school changing rooms.

Not that it was a great deal better when, eventually, my mother gave me 12/6, or whatever it was, and let me go and buy a bra. I went to an old-fashioned women’s underwear store on Wimbledon High Street, next door to the second hand bookshop, to try one on (where else could I have gone? I didn’t yet know, or register, that Marks and Spencers sold such things). The grey-haired harridans who were serving there tried a couple on me, which palpably didn’t fit – and then told me that because I had a narrow back compared with the (embarrassing enough, as things were) size of what I was trying to cram into the bra cups, I would need a Nursing Bra. Unsurprisingly, I fled, and arrived home in mortified tears. My mother, I later found out, went round to give them A Piece of Her Mind – which can’t have been remotely pleasant for them.

1 comment:

  1. The charity 'Raising Malawi' (PR firm) founded by Madonna AND TWO OTHERS over three years ago held fund raisers for over two years before finally getting registered as a non-profit. In other words, Madonna and the others were free to squander the lion's share of that funding any way they saw fit for those first two years. She also pleaded with her fans worldwide for donations along the way. In the meantime, she toured the world to promote her latest CD and raked in another $280,000,000 gross in just over 12 months. To date, the basic financial info for 'Rasing Malawi' still hasn't been posted on the website or anywhere else. The 'progress' page only tells of the collective works by over 20 seperate charities. Each of which have their own sources of funding and may have recieved some sort of promotion or support from 'Raising Malawi' in order to be considered 'partners'. But no indication is made how much of their funding came from 'Raising Malawi' or how much of their progress if any could be directly attributed to 'Raising Malawi'. The fans/donors have no clue how many millions of dollars were raised in that first two years, no clue how much Madonna herself chipped in, and no clue how the money was spent before they finally registered as a non-profit. No clue what tiny little fraction of funding or works listed on that 'progress' page could be directly attributed to 'Raising Malawi'. Nothing to go on but the vague word of Madonna. The vague and very misleading word of Madonna. For example: She states in her latest promotional video that she will match any contributions made to her charity (PR firm) "dollar for dollar". However there is a disclaimer posted on the website for 'Raising Malawi' that Madonna's total contribution will not exceed $100,000. Thats not per donation. Thats a maximum of $100,000 TOTAL. Less than a single days pay for Madonna. Also much less then she will surely rake in by promoting her own CDs, DVDs, and 'for profit' merchandise through this massive worldwide publicity stunt. So I called the office of 'Raising Malawi' in an attempt to verify some sort of efficient financial operation (310) 867-2881 or (888) 72-DONOR). These details are ALWAYS made available by legitimate charities to their potential donors. But not in this case. I got nothing but recorded messages and hangups. So I did some research on my own. 'Rasing Malawi' still hasn't been given any kind of rating by ANY independent charity watchdog like The vast overwhelming majority of 'celebrity' foundations never are. In general, they are inneficient and riddled with corruption. Like the promotion of CDs, world tours, commercial websites, entire lines of jewelry (not just the single piece from which proceeds are donated), and high end fashion retail flagship stores. Celebrity foundations are also notorious for squandering much of their funding on travel and super high end accomodations for their celebrity figure heads. Its legal even for a nonprofit but not noble or efficient by any stretch of the imagination. In general, 'celebrity' foundations are a twisted inefficient mutant of charity, self-promotion, and PR crap. They actually compete for funding with more efficient legitimate charities who do more work with less money. Its a sham. So if its not rated, then don't support it. Instead, support a top rated charity like any of those given high ratings at